Resources for Sexual Wholeness

We are preaching on the Ten Commandments at ACC this fall. The 7^th commandment says: “You shall not commit adultery.” The Bible portrays physical intimacy within the covenant of marriage (between a man and a woman) as God’s design for healthy sexuality (Gen. 2:21-25). It describes as immoral any expression of sexual behavior outside of this context (Matt. 15:19; 1 Cor. 6:9-10; Hebrew 13:4). Jesus explained that the 7^th commandment calls us to sexual purity, not only in our actions, but even in our private thoughts (Matt. 5:27-28).

This teaching raises deep feelings of hurt and shame for all of us. Debra Hirsch has written, “Every human being on this planet is sexually broken. Everybody’s orientation is disoriented. [Not] one of us is excluded.” Yet Christ offers all of us forgiveness, healing, and power to express our sexuality in ways that are healthy and honoring to God.

I recently asked several Christian friends, whose thoughtfulness and insight I respect, if they can recommend any resources for people struggling for sexual wholeness. Of course, reading a book will not solve the whole problem for us. Life change is the product of repeated acts of faith and obedience, in the context of community, empowered by the Holy Spirit. But exposure to good teaching is a vital part of our spiritual growth.

Here are some of their recommendations (along with a few of my own):

UNDERSTANDING GOD'S DESIGN FOR SEX

God, You, & Sex (David White)

Sex and the Supremacy of Christ (eds. John Piper & Justin Taylor)

Love Thy Body (Nancy R. Pearcey)

Real Sex (Lauren Winner)

SEXUAL TEMPTATION IN GENERAL

Sexual Sanity for Men (David White)

Sexual Sanity for Women (Harvest USA)

Samson and the Pirate Monks – Calling Men to Authentic Brotherhood (Nate Larkin)

The Fight of Your Life (Tim Clinton)

FORGIVENESS & RESTORATION FROM SEXUAL SIN

Redeeming Sex – Naked Conversations About Sexuality and Spirituality (Debra Hirsch)

Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction (Mark Laaser)

Setting Us Free  (Nick Stumbo)

Unburdened – The Christian Leader’s Path to Sexual Integrity (Michael Todd Wilson)

HEALING FROM SEXUAL ABUSE

Rid of My Disgrace (Justin & Lindsey Holcomb)

Suffering and the Heart of God (Diane Langberg)

PORNOGRAPHY

Wired for Intimacy – How Pornography Highjacks the Male Brain (William M. Struthers)

When Your Husband is Addicted to Pornography (Vicki Tiede)

In the Shadows of the Net (Carnes, Delmonico, & Griffin)

SAME SEX ATTRACTION / LGBT ISSUES

Is God Anti-Gay (Sam Allberry)

Washed and Waiting (Wesley Hill)

Gay Girl Good God (Jackie Hill Perry)

enGendered (Sam A. Andreades)

MARITAL RECOVERY FROM INFIDELITY

NOT “Just Friends” (Shirley P. Glass)

It’s Not Supposed to Be This Way (Lysa TerKeurst)

After the Affair (Janis Abrahms Spring)

The Five Languages of Apology (Gary Chapman & Jennifer Thomas)

HEALTHY MARITAL INTIMACY

The Meaning of Marriage (Timothy Keller)

The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work (John Gottman)

Mating in Captivity (Esther Perel)

Intimate Allies (Dan Allender & Tremper Longman)

TEACHING CHILDREN ABOUT SEX

God’s Design for Sex – Four book series (Stan & Brenna Jones)

A Practical Guide to Culture – Helping the Next Generation Navigate Today’s World (John Stonestreet)

God Made All of Me (Justin S. Holcomb)